Casino UNO
I see the Palms in Las Vegas is bringing in an “UNO Social Club.” No, not in the pit, although there are a couple of kids’ card games you can gamble on, like Casino War and Criss Cross.
No, this will be a luxury suite based on the popular card game, with a collection of unique variations on UNO, featuring gaming tables, private dealers and multiple amenities, according to the casino.
When I first saw this, it occurred to me that I never played the game as a kid. When Monopoly came to the slot floor in the late 1990s, it immediately brought back memories of sessions of the famous board game at my cousin’s house. He always wanted to be the little schnauzer dog and I’d take the little horse, and invariably, we’d end up aiming the tokens at each other in simulated flatulence duels.
This was just last week, by the way.
Anyhoo, after a bit of research, I realized that I did play a forerunner of UNO when I was a kid. According to Mr. Wikipedia, UNO “is a proprietary American shedding-type card game… Played with a specially printed deck, the game is derived from the Crazy Eights family of card games which, in turn, is based on the traditional German game of mau-mau.”
Crazy Eights! Now there’s a game I know. Mau-mau, not so much. It sounds like a made-up name.
I’m wondering when the Palms will come up with a Go Fish Social Club, or an Old Maid Social Club, or maybe a Yahtzee Club. (I know, there was a Yahtzee slot machine once, but it tanked because Yahtzee isn’t Yahtzee without the dice in the cup.)
Crazy Eights, by the way, was created in the 1940s, the name referencing the military Section 8 mental discharge that some soldiers acted crazy to get. Now you know.
But we were talking about the Crazy Eights descendant UNO and the new UNO Social Club at the Palms, which also is being duplicated as a bar attraction in several big cities.
Patrons will able to play “UNO Golf,” in which you match cards by color and number, but instead of keeping the high cards, you get rid of them, because low score wins.
Then there’s “UNO Teams,” in which players pair up in teams of two and play together, both players having to get rid of all their cards to win.
Then there’s “UNO Show ‘em No Mercy,” which has more cards, tougher penalties and rules that will have players stacking, swapping and drawing more cards than ever.
I’ll be anxious to see whether the latter two, combined with alcohol in a bar setting, will result in fistfights. Maybe that’s where gambling can be applied. As soon as two guys start to go at it, bets on the outcome of the fight can be taken.
Hey, I’m always thinking.
According to a Palms press release, the plan by UNO owner Mattel is to open clubs in bars across the United States, each with “UNO-themed drink menus, tournament-style play, photo moments and more.”
I think a Crazy Eights-themed drink would be cool as well. You know, eight shots per cocktail. I’ll bet the fistfights would be better.
And maybe someday, you’ll be able to bet on UNO at the casino locations. Not now, according to an Instagram post from, I guess, Mattel’s UNO division. “We hate to be the bearers of bad news, but the casino floor isn’t ready for us yet,” said “The UNO Team” in the post. “We’ve been told that while they do have tight security, it’s not robust enough for UNO at this time… This isn’t a Reverse card.”
I guess they’d need more security to handle the fistfights, right? “Reverse” is the card that reverses the direction of the UNO deal order by the designated dealer from clockwise to counter-clockwise.
No, I didn’t get the reference either.
But now I know why I never played UNO as a kid. It was invented in 1971 by Merle Robbins of Reading, Ohio, who sold it from his barbershop, and then to other businesses, and eventually, to Mattel.
I was past my card game phase in 1971 and into my hippie-wannabe-garage-rock-band-and-just-you-never-mind-what-else phase.
Also, I don’t believe I ever set foot in a barbershop in the early 1970s. Don’t much these days either, but for an entirely different reason (no hair).
Moving on, a guy was arrested for injuring four people last month during a fight at the Orleans in Las Vegas. He told police he was “protecting his wife,” but surveillance video showed he was just being a jagoff, and his wife was nowhere near.
I’m wondering if UNO was involved.
