Once in a while, when I can’t think of something to write about, I look up my column from exactly one year ago, to see if there’s anything I can “update,” or “steal.” In August 2012, I wrote about how hard it was to do two magazines in a month, in that case Casino Design along with GGB.
This month, the two magazines I did are GGB and G2E Preview. I can effectively update last year’s comments thusly: It is still hard to do two magazines in a month. Moving on…
A Palm Springs, California artist is preparing a piece for an exhibit opening in the fall that he calls “Santa’s Casino Stealth Bull.” According to the Baltimore Business Journal, Santa’s Casino Stealth Bull includes “toilet bowls, reindeer antlers and casino parts.” The artist, Kenny Irwin Jr., who, it says here, is known for building “dreamscapes,” told the newspaper his new creation is “going to be pulled by nine robo deer made out of full-size toilet seats.”
Wow. Think of what Rembrandt could have done with toilet seats, had they been invented. But it’s not the “robo deer” that piqued my interest. It’s the “casino parts” that are reportedly part of Santa’s Casino Stealth Bull that have me perplexed.
What casino parts? Part of the Mirage volcano? The marquee from Hooters? A gaming table from Sinatra’s Cal Neva? An ashtray from the MGM? Maybe the deal is that the toilet seats are out of a casino somewhere. Perhaps someone grabbed the thrones from the Dunes before they blew it up.
Sometimes, I don’t get art.
Moving on again, a Bethlehem, Pennsylvania man who three years ago was evicted permanently from the Sands Casino Resort Bethlehem slipped back into the property, sat down at the bar, and, according to police, “stole drinks.” The man ran up a $36 tab, with no money on him and no intention to pay.
“I thought I was invisible,” the man said.
Not really. He didn’t say anything, but perhaps he figured that since he was banned, nobody would ever know he was there. Or that banned patrons are entitled to bar comps. Just as with Santa’s casino parts, I am perplexed.
But not as perplexed as I am with Paul Davies. (Segue rating: 7.1.) Davies, an adjunct journalism professor at Temple University and a research fellow for the New York-based think tank Institute for American Values, wrote a column blasting New York Governor Andrew Cuomo over the casino issue.
The column, published by the blog Syracuse.com, criticized Cuomo’s push for casinos in upstate New York. Professor Davies wrote as follows:
“Cuomo has provided no evidence to his claim that upstate casinos will become tourist magnates.”
Tourist “magnates,” Perfesser? I thought a tourist magnate was a wealthy baron who owned a chain of tourist getaways, or maybe a chain of tourists. OK, he may have a point in his column about the state government’s push for more casinos being an ill-considered move. But I’m not listening to any journalism professor who doesn’t know the difference between a magnet and a magnate.
Finally, the Fantasy Springs Resort Casino outside of Palm Springs is serving as the setting for the SyFy Channel original movie Blast Vegas. According to a description of the film on the mydesert.com news site, Malcolm In The Middle’s Frankie Muniz “plays a nerdy friend who tags along with a group of wild frat brothers who head to Las Vegas for the spring break of a lifetime. After one of them steals an Egyptian relic from a casino, an ancient curse is released, and things get ugly.”
Boy, I hate when that happens. Take one little trinket from a display at the Luxor, and your family members all turn into jackals.
The article continues: “At some point in the movie, a computer-generated plane will crash onto the craps table on the gaming floor, the 18th hole at Eagle Falls Golf Course will become a tiger habitat and the area outside the Fresh Grill Buffet will be a museum complete with priceless Egyptian relics.”
Whew! Thank goodness it was just a computer-generated plane. Someone could have gotten killed.
Now, I could maybe buy the story line of a tiger habitat along a golf course. I’ve seen something like that in a casino before, although not on a golf course. But priceless Egyptian relics outside a buffet?
“Go get me more bread pudding, Irving… Hey, isn’t that Nefertiti?”
What can I say? It’s been a perplexing month.
You know, some people call me a slot-machine magnate. Or is it magnet?